While listening to his podcast, I found the link to this article and thought it was very good. In it, he discusses some of the trials, successes and surprises from his first year of FIRE.
I think I’m going to create a new category just for lessons from the first years of FI. Its a topic I’m very interested in, as I close in on my number.
Mr. 39 Monts
The comments below reflect the thoughts and idea of myself, a 54-year old man, raised in that time period. Some people may question the assumptions or thoughts here, but they are mine, and I believe they reflect a certain percentage of the men my age in the FI community. Since the purpose of this blog is for me to discuss my thoughts on FI, and its impact on my life, I do not have any problem with voicing my opinions and thoughts on the matter.
As someone born at the tail end of the boomers/beginning of Gen X (1964) my general thoughts on men is that we are the providers in a relationship (I know, everyone has different opinions here – I’m talking in generalities here, so sue me). Men have the ability to generate excess resources beyond their needs. Anyone who has ever been to a bachelor’s home knows that they don’t need much to live. I once heard a female comedian call men “bears with furniture.”
A typical bachelor pad will have some basic furniture, maybe a card table instead of a dining table, and a functional bed. Not much on decorations, curtains, exotic cooking gear, etc. They will probably have a great TV/entertainment set up. Their clothes requirements will be simple and not excessive. After that though, they don’t need much. Yet they have the ability to generate large incomes and throw off excess money.
This is why the basic family unit worked so well. Raising kids takes an awful lot of time and resources, so by having two people working on it, the man can generate the excess resources necessary for the family to get what they need. In return, the man gets a feeling of accomplishment on his work, and the belief that he is contributing to the success of his family.
So where am I going here?
As you close in on FI, and you reach the point where you have sufficient resources to maintain your lifestyle, the primary reason for many men’s existence suddenly is threatened. If they have reached the point where the family has what it needs in perpetuity, then why is he needed? One of a man’s primary roles in the family is gone. What do you do?
I think this is a major reason why we see so many men dying shortly after their retirement. Their major role in life is gone, and they struggle to find something new. They’ve been working at this since they are 18, and for some, that is 45-50 years of life’s work that is suddenly gone. All they’ve known in their adult life……
I’m struggling with that right now. I’ve got 24-1/2 months left to go, and while I have some short-term goals (travel, writing, etc.) I am not sure what I want to do once I hit FI. I know I want to take some time off (sabbatical?) but then what?
An interesting book that I have just started reading is Find your Why, by Simon Sinek. The idea is to search for the core idea of “why” you do stuff, “why” your exist, “why” you act the way you do and what that gives you. Knowing your “WHY” gives you a filter to make choices, both at work and home, that leads you to finding greater fulfillment. The book is interesting (as is the TED talk) and I’m hoping the exercises it has will lead me to further revelations.
Other blog postings related:
I hope this helps
Mr. 39 Months
Interesting concept – doing work for a short 6-week/8-week period on something that interests you, where they need the assistance.
Our Next Life has a good post with a lot of data on how people are doing once they retire early. A good read
I always appreciate his articles, especially when he gets into a deep topic. In this one, he discusses how not having intrinsic motivation for something else when you retire will cause you to fail (either returning to work, or worse). Good read.
Excellent post about the emotions running through a couple as they are just 4 weeks from early retirement.
She runs the spectrum on the uncertainty, sadness, and physical ailments that have popped up as they close in on their final date. An excellent read when people want to understand what it will be like as they approach the frontier.
Mr. 39 Months
I was listening to one of my financial podcasts, Stacking Benjamin’s, and on one of their recent shows, and their guest was talking about early retirement and issues that many folks don’t think about. One of the more interesting ones (and one that I have thought about a lot as I get closer) is the social aspect of work, and how that might leave a hole when a person retires.
For most folks it is the people at work who form their social circle (outside their immediate family). These are the folks they see every day, talk with at the coffee machine, and discuss last night’s TV show or game. You get to know their families, trials and tribulations, and life stories. These people are the “village” you have to live in for 8+ hours a day – and it is often the thought of leaving these folks (and moving to another “village”) that keeps people in the same job for years. I know that is one of the major things keeping my sister-in-law still working.
It has been noted that folks often have a hard time getting new friends (or keeping old ones) as they age. People drift apart, both geographically and in their interests. Men often have a particularly difficult time of this, and sometimes have no friends they can turn to in their later years.
I’ve joined several organizations (outdoors, woodworking, professional society) in order to try and get out. As I look to achieve financial independence, I know I am going to have to work hard to be more outgoing, and seek stronger friendships with folks in my interest groups. It won’t be easy – but it is a challenge worth the trouble.
How are you folks preparing or working on this?
Mr. 39 Months
In line with my previous post, I have noticed a lot of comments and articles on the FIRE blogs lately about what folks plan to do (or are doing) once they achieve financial independence. They often follow a pattern of travel and doing projects/tasks that you put off because you didn’t have the time. This typically occupies folks for the first 12-24 months once they “retire” and then the hard part comes in.
Some folks like “Mr. Retire by 40” turned into the stay-at-home dad, while his wife continued to work. His wife enjoys her job, so they’ll keep at this for some time before they both retire. In the meantime, he takes care of their child, travels in the summer, and continues his work on his blog and other activities.
Others, like Mz Liz or ESI money have taken up counseling folks on financial independence, investing, and how to financially improve their lives. They have taken something that they are good at, have a passion for, and sought to “give back” to the community.
Still, for many others enroute to financial independence, the question remains of how we are going to fill our time once we have so much of it to fill.
For me, I know that I will need to find something to occupy my time, due to my mindset. I’ve been a “go getter” all my life, rising through the corporate ranks. I don’t see myself “kicking back.” My wife says our vacations are always busy, going from place to place, always on the move. My “retirement” will probably be the same. I have a couple of things which can occupy me for the first 12-18 months (finish the Appalachian Trail hike, road trips throughout the US, visiting family and friends, etc.) – but eventually I will need something to occupy my time.
Right now, I’m looking at several options:
Retirement Manifesto has article on UnRetirement in reference to this
Of course, something else may pop its head up, so we will see.
What are you thinking of doing once you are free?
Mr. 39 months.