Diminishing Friendships in Retirement?

I was listening to one of my financial podcasts, Stacking Benjamin’s, and on one of their recent shows, and their guest was talking about early retirement and issues that many folks don’t think about. One of the more interesting ones (and one that I have thought about a lot as I get closer) is the social aspect of work, and how that might leave a hole when a person retires.

For most folks it is the people at work who form their social circle (outside their immediate family). These are the folks they see every day, talk with at the coffee machine, and discuss last night’s TV show or game. You get to know their families, trials and tribulations, and life stories. These people are the “village” you have to live in for 8+ hours a day – and it is often the thought of leaving these folks (and moving to another “village”) that keeps people in the same job for years. I know that is one of the major things keeping my sister-in-law still working.

It has been noted that folks often have a hard time getting new friends (or keeping old ones) as they age. People drift apart, both geographically and in their interests. Men often have a particularly difficult time of this, and sometimes have no friends they can turn to in their later years.

I’ve joined several organizations (outdoors, woodworking, professional society) in order to try and get out. As I look to achieve financial independence, I know I am going to have to work hard to be more outgoing, and seek stronger friendships with folks in my interest groups. It won’t be easy – but it is a challenge worth the trouble.

How are you folks preparing or working on this?

Other similar links:

Money Logue: how to deal with the emotions of retiring alone

Mr. 39 Months

You’ve achieved Financial Independence! Now What?

In line with my previous post, I have noticed a lot of comments and articles on the FIRE blogs lately about what folks plan to do (or are doing) once they achieve financial independence. They often follow a pattern of travel and doing projects/tasks that you put off because you didn’t have the time. This typically occupies folks for the first 12-24 months once they “retire” and then the hard part comes in.

Some folks like “Mr. Retire by 40” turned into the stay-at-home dad, while his wife continued to work. His wife enjoys her job, so they’ll keep at this for some time before they both retire. In the meantime, he takes care of their child, travels in the summer, and continues his work on his blog and other activities.

Others, like Mz Liz or ESI money have taken up counseling folks on financial independence, investing, and how to financially improve their lives. They have taken something that they are good at, have a passion for, and sought to “give back” to the community.

Still, for many others enroute to financial independence, the question remains of how we are going to fill our time once we have so much of it to fill.

For me, I know that I will need to find something to occupy my time, due to my mindset. I’ve been a “go getter” all my life, rising through the corporate ranks. I don’t see myself “kicking back.” My wife says our vacations are always busy, going from place to place, always on the move. My “retirement” will probably be the same. I have a couple of things which can occupy me for the first 12-18 months (finish the Appalachian Trail hike, road trips throughout the US, visiting family and friends, etc.) – but eventually I will need something to occupy my time.

Right now, I’m looking at several options:

  1. Volunteering: I have several things I would like to volunteer for, including Habitat for Humanity, teaching, mentoring and financial advisor
  2. Real Estate: Either as a realtor or getting into flipping and renting, I have always had an interest. I need to do some informational interviewing of realtors to get more data.
  3. Finance: Either as a registered agent and counsellor, as a volunteer, or working with the web, I would like to help people achieve the financial independence that I have.

Retirement Manifesto has article on UnRetirement in reference to this

Of course, something else may pop its head up, so we will see.

What are you thinking of doing once you are free?

 

Mr. 39 months.